On the way up to Chicago I re-listened to some of the Torchwood radio plays…
I listened to The Deadline and Asylum.
Asylum was much better than I remember. Gwen was pretty awesome in it. It felt a little redundant —- how many time/rift displaced people stories do we need? However, it was enjoyable. I’d completely forgotten 98% of it so it was like hearing something new. I liked Jack playing with the future-tech and it making toy laser gun noises. Eve Myles and GDL are much better radio actors than John Barrowman. Tom Price did okay too. The girl was MUCH better than some of the radio actors they get (Carlie from Submission, I’m totally looking at you right now).
Look, I know the shippers love The Deadline, but my goodness, has anyone ever listened to it just for the story? It’s fucking ridiculous. The entire plot can be summed up as “Jack is a moron.” Not to mention, Ianto really does play a hand wringing maiden in it. Gwen and Rhys sort of blunder upon the right answer and Ianto comes up with the solution out of completely left field. Questions I have:
- WHY DID JACK EVER THINK IT WAS A GOOD IDEA TO ANSWER THE PHONE? That’s dumb even for him. For real.
- WHY DID NO ONE TRY SHOOTING JACK? The worst thing that could have happened was he resurrected still in a trance. However, knowing how Jack’s body heals and “resets” at death, it seems FAR MORE LIKELY that he would have been cured.
- Why did Ianto tell Stella that Jack was dying? Ianto knows he wasn’t.
- Stella said all of Jack’s non-essential brain waves were defunct Basically, the only parts of his mind firing were the ones he needed to keep breathing and keep his organs running — IF THIS IS TRUE HOW THE HELL DID HE HEAR IANTO’S MONOLOGUE?
- How the hell did Ianto come up with the “antivirus” plan? If the virus had jumped into the mobile phone network, how did using the old retro phone help him? Shouldn’t he have needed to use either 1) a mobile phone or 2) a brain like the virus did? The “virus” only made phones ring by using people’s minds. Ianto’s computer reset shouldn’t have worked on an old land line.
- WTF DEADLINE YOU MAKE THE LEAST SENSE OF ALL OF THE PLAYS. Seriously, when Torchwood in Submarine and Torchwood in India makes more sense then you’re doing it wrong.